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  • Writer's pictureWomen of Drummer

Joy, Play, and Connection: My First Regional Weekend

My first regional on the grand title tour as Woman of Drummer 2022 began in the Bay Area. I had always wanted to visit California, and it was finally happening. It was a weekend of joy, play, and connection that I will always remember.

Friday night was the meet and greet, and I was nervous! We were sharing the SF Eagle with Queer As F*ck and Queer Leather Happy Hour, so it was bound to be a full house. On the ride over from the hotel I felt my palms get sweaty from the anticipation. My roommate and mentor for the weekend, Shay, kindly reassured me that not only would I represent us well, she would be there with me if I needed any support. Her words and warm presence alleviated my anxiety completely, and I found my excitement.

At the Eagle we were enthusiastically greeted by several WOD who were waiting for us. I was lovingly embraced by each of them, as if we had known each other for years. Not only is this movement badass, it’s full of love and camaraderie. Before I knew it I was whisked away to meet everyone that had trickled into the now packed outdoor area of the bar. The highlight of my evening was when I got to play on the bootblack stand. Bruises spread across my chest and thighs as the partygoers looked on with huge smiles on their faces. I couldn’t think of a better way to start the weekend.

Saturday began with the roundtable at the Folsom Street Community Center. Shay and I arrived early and explored the library. I felt thrilled to be in the presence of so much knowledge, history, and some smut too. Once again I was a bit nervous. This was my first Women of Drummer roundtable, and here I was facilitating it! Once again, I had nothing to worry about. Conversation moved smoothly, although a bit slowly. I was grateful to share stories with everyone and bear witness to their truths.

Later that night the play party commenced. I had the opportunity to share my body with two experienced tops that I had been curious about since Ramblewood. I felt the cool air of the room on my skin as I removed my leather and clothing, preparing myself for them. Soon I was bent over a massage table, getting flogged and beaten by one top as the other gently caressed my warm, tender skin. At one point an implement struck my back; white hot pain seared into my flesh, and tears came to my eyes. For the first time I allowed myself to submit, to experience pain to the point of crying, much to the delight of my tops. The rest of the evening I was flying high.

Sunday consisted of brunch and the beach with some of the Oakland crew. Outside of my WOD duties there wasn’t much space for sightseeing, but I couldn’t leave without seeing the ocean. My gracious hosts brought me to Alameda Beach where we walked along the sand and connected with one another. The beauty of the beach and the richness of these new friendships filled my heart to the brim.

My trip to the Bay ended with the Santa Service Fundraiser hosted by the Alameda County Leather Corps. ACLC president (and one of my new friends) Nyna was a sight to behold in a Santa apron that barely covered the lace ensemble she wore beneath. I had the pleasure of auctioning off a package to Ramblewood in support of the Alameda County Food Bank and once again, making new friends at the bar in between drag performances.

My first regional and trip to the Bay Area was more successful than I could have imagined. I am infinitely grateful for everyone who took care of me and befriended me during the weekend, and can’t wait to return.


Woman of Drummer, 2022

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